


Ballmer Peak

by theVeraciousIntrovert



Category: Borderlands
Genre: Alcohol, Christmas, Cuddling, Fluff, Implied Sexual Content, M/M, Short & Sweet, drunk coding, it's christmas and they're super cute, mentions of spanking, mild dubcon, playful chasing, threats of laptop sodomy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2015-12-20
Updated: 2015-12-20
Packaged: 2018-05-07 21:05:25
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 874
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5470745
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/theVeraciousIntrovert/pseuds/theVeraciousIntrovert
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Rhys thought they'd finally have a day to themselves, what with Jack staying home for the holiday.  Jack, however, seems to have other plans.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Ballmer Peak

**Author's Note:**

> Just a short piece for the holidays~ Hope you like it!

Rhys stretched, his toes pressing into Jack’s thigh while his back arched over the arm of the couch.  “It’s Christmas, babe.  You can take a day off.”  Jack grunted and took another sip of his hot chocolate, made by Rhys in an effort to distract him.  At this point, it was more peppermint schnapps than cocoa, and honestly seemed more motivating than distracting, but…  Well, Rhys tried.

“Two words, cupcake.  Ballmer.  Peak.  Gonna have this security patch…” he paused to take another swig. “Ahh!  Perfect.  Jusssst gotta get more drunk.”  Rhys rolled his eyes, prodding Jack’s leg again.

“You know I’ve never actually seen that Ballmer shit _work_.  And besides, I’m pretty sure you’ve just been commenting ‘fuck you’ everywhere for the last half hour.  So why don’t you just take a break?”  Jack just chuckled and patted Rhys’s shin.

“It’ll work, sweetcheeks.  It’ll work.  And then, when I’m done, you’ll get your Christmas present, I promise.”  Rhys snorted and picked his game back up.  Before he started playing, he cast a thoughtful glance towards the small gift box still resting under the tree.

“I’ll probably beat this game before you give up…  Should just go open my present now, save you the trouble of having to pause in your drunk nightmare coding.”  Before Rhys could finish his sentence, Jack had twisted his hand to tightly grip Rhys’s ankle from below.

“Don’t.  you.  dare.”

“Or what?  You’ll spank me?” Rhys teased, wiggling his toes.  “That would require abandoning your… precious… s-security patch…”  He faltered, watching the predatory curl to Jack’s smile.  “No no no no no no, Jack, don’t even think about it, it was a joke, you promised I’d be able to be able sit comfortably when we had dinner with everyone tonight—” His babbling pleas were cut off by a plastic snap.  With his free hand, Jack gently moved his now-closed laptop to the coffee table, eyes never leaving Rhys.  His calm demeanor was one Rhys knew all too well, and he tensed, bringing his other foot up, preparing to fight or flee, whichever became necessary.

“Hey, Rhysie?”

“…yes?”

“Run,” Jack breathed with a grin, finally releasing his ankle.  Rhys tumbled backwards off the couch, managing to narrowly avoid breaking his neck, and he was already rolling to his feet, dashing off because he could hear Jack getting up behind him and it was only a matter of time before he started running too, and of course this was futile, just for the fun of the chase, of course Jack was going to catch him, and _oh_ , he was going to let him have it, not that Rhys didn’t enjoy that, he just didn’t need Vaughn’s raised eyebrow when the unforgiving wood of the dining room chair made Rhys wince…  Rhys’s thoughts were running faster than he was; he didn’t notice when his striped reindeer socks failed to find purchase on the polished floors. He would have gone crashing to the ground if not for strong, broad hands hooking under his armpits.

“Jesus, pumpkin, careful!  Gonna split your head open one of these days,” he admonished between chuckles.  Rhys pulled away, righting himself with arms crossed defensively.  “Oh, stop pouting.  I just like seeing you run, you know I wasn’t really going to spank you.  I am, if nothing else, a man of my word…  at least, sometimes,” he amended, noting Rhys’s raised eyebrow.  “When I’m in a good mood.  But, hey, I’m _always_ in a good mood with you, Rhysie!”  Rhys rolled his eyes at his boyfriend’s cheeky smile.

“Fine, fine, you’re forgiven,” he huffed, watching Jack with narrowed eyes.

“Good, good, and I promise, I’ll give you your gift soon, I just—” Jack was already turning around, heading back towards the living room, but Rhys grabbed his wrist, and when he spun to face him, they were nose-to-nose, Rhys’s breath mingling with Jack’s, cocoa and peppermint and temptation.

“If you open that laptop again, _love_ ,” he threatened sweetly, “I will take a hammer to it and shove the pieces so far up your ass you’ll be able to _taste_ them.”  Jack chuckled, the smirk returning to his lips.

“Mmm, kitten, talk dirty to me,” he hummed, leaning in as if to kiss him.  “Too bad I know you can’t follow through~  I’ll be back in a few, kay?”  He patted Rhys’s cheek and turned his back once more.

 

* * *

  

Jack stretched leisurely, humming as Rhys took the opportunity to nuzzle closer.  Nisha had been right; diamonds were perfect for Rhys.  The pendant sparkled in the pale afternoon sunlight, throwing little rainbows across their bare chests.

“Hn…  Just-fucked looks good on you, pumpkin.”  Rhys opened one eye, pressing bruised lips together in what was supposed to be a pout.  Jack just chuckled and ran his fingers through Rhys’s already-messy hair.  “Could almost make me forget to punish you for destroying my laptop.”  Rhys’s pout dissolved into a pleased laugh.

“I warned you.  You brought that upon yourself,” he teased, leaning into Jack’s touch.  “Mmm…  But sure, if it makes you feel better, you can punish me.  _After_ we get back from dinner.”

“Fine.  After.”  Jack snorted, for once not minding the smug look on Rhys’s features.  “Merry Christmas, Rhysie-cakes.”

“Merry Christmas, Jackass.”


End file.
